|
|
|
'But I Neeeeeed It!' She Suggested
LAST Christmas, Kristi Stangeland, a mother of two who lives in Hastings-on-Hudson, N.Y., made a grievous mistake: she bought her 14-year-old daughter, Erika Hinman, a shiny new MP3 player. But it was the wrong MP3 player.
Skip to next paragraph
David Graham for The New York Times
Despite a cellphone, an iPod and a hand-held computer, Jen Lang has fallen behind a friend whose old phone she ridiculed.
\"I tried to get away with getting her an MP3 player that was $100 cheaper,\" Ms. Stangeland explained sheepishly.
\"I was in the biggest dog box,\" she said, recalling Erika's crestfallen response. \"She went to school, and everyone else had got an iPod for Christmas. It was like, 'How come everyone else got one, and you couldn't buy me an iPod?' So we got one for her birthday two months later.\"
Although parents have long struggled with their teenagers' desire to own the newest, coolest stuff, these days the battle has reached a new dimension. While teenagers once coveted $100 sneakers and jeans (arguably necessities because, after all, they are clothes), the must-have items now - iPods, cellphones with cameras, and portable DVD players - are high-tech, constantly in need of upgrade and can cost up to $500 each. These items, which teenagers say they must have to maintain their place in the social pecking order, are increasingly out of reach for most high school students, who are less likely these days to hold part-time jobs. Researchers who study child behavior call this pressure \"nag factor\" or \"pester power,\" and often use it to describe how young children, in whom advertising has planted a desire for junk food or toys, lobby their parents. Now the same pestering is reaching a fever pitch among teenagers, who crave an ever-expanding collection of high-tech items they can't possibly afford.
The upshot is that more parents are finding themselves in the situation that Ms. Stangeland faced: footing the bill so their children can maintain social face.
\"It's a good reason never to grow up,\" said Cary Silvers, vice president for consumer trends at Roper Youth Report, a nationwide poll from NOP World, a consumer research firm, which recently found that 18 percent of boys aged 13 to 17 surveyed owned an MP3 player, and that 37 percent owned a DVD player. But only 10 percent of the teenagers had a job, and on average they netted only $29 a week.
\"The bottom line,\" Mr. Silvers said, \"is the majority of their purchases are subsidized by parents and other family members like grandparents.\"
It is a vortex of contemporary social currents: teenagers' longing outstrips their ability to satisfy it and collides with most parents' hope to teach restraint and fiscal responsibility. The issue is not just pressing for the middle class. Teenagers of all economic groups are exposed to the same advertising and social pressures, and families rich and poor struggle with how and how much to provide.
\" arents are told by psychologists that they should pick their battles with their kids,\" said Susan Linn, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School and Judge Baker Children's Center. \"But should they pick the iPod battle, the cellphone battle or the R-rated movie battle? I think parents are really struggling. There are more things for kids to nag them for, and because these things are expensive, they're likely to go for their parents.\"
IT is no secret that Apple's sleek iPod, costing $99 to $449, has become, to the American teenager, a de rigueur fashion item, not just a handy gadget.
\"The iPod blew up the category,\" said Sharon Lee, a founder of Look-Look Inc., a company in Hollywood that tracks teenage consumer behavior. Not only did Apple's MP3 player \"open a category that just didn't exist before,\" she said; it changed the way teenagers thought about gadgetry.
But the iPod is not the only object of great desire. \"In the last couple of years, there seems to be a shift in badge items,\" said Michael Wood, a vice president at Teenage Research Unlimited in Northbrook, Ill., which tracks youth buying patterns for more than 150 companies. \"Whereas in the past it was an expensive pair of shoes or jeans - something on the fashion side - today the excitement and buzz is really around technology.\"
Tina Wells, who founded Buzz Marketing Group, another youth market researcher, based in New York, said the shift in priorities was particularly evident when she polled teenagers about what they coveted as gifts during the last holiday season. In 2003, Ms. Wells said, \"it was all fashion.\"
\"Everyone wanted a gift certificate to the Gap,\" she said. Last year, however, 63 percent listed a tech item as their gift of choice.
Three-quarters of teenagers between 15 and 17 now have mobile phones, up from 57 percent last year, according to the Roper Youth Report, an annual poll. Parents pay for 74 percent of the wireless plans in question, according to another survey, by the NOP World mKids Study, perhaps reflecting the fact that many parents see cellphones as a practical and safety item. \"retty much everybody has a cellphone, and iPods, probably one out of three people,\" said Greg Becker, 15, of Owings Mills, Md. \"It's huge. I get on my bus in the morning, everybody is listening to little white earbuds. Last year it was only a couple of kids. For guys, having an Xbox or a PS2, all the guys have those. Off the top of my head I can think of one person who doesn't.\"
Jen Lang, 17, a high school senior from Erial, N.J., who also works at Buzz Marketing, said: \"I used to make fun of my friend. He had a Nokia phone that was so four years ago.\"
\"Unfortunately,\" she added, \"he just got a new camera phone. It was like $400, so now I'm behind.\"
The issue hit home for Mr. Silvers of the Roper Youth survey last year, when his 15-year-old daughter was resolute about what she wanted for the holidays: an iPod Mini. Her twin brothers, 12, chimed in that they needed iPods, too.
\"They were really hopped up,\" Mr. Silvers said. \"They were badgering us.\" All three of them got their iPods. \"Not to make them sound spoiled, but usually kids are sort of blasé about their gifts,\" he said. \"There was nothing blasé about this.\"
The Roper Youth survey, to be published in early June, found substantial jumps in ownership across most of the \"cool\" categories of consumer electronics for both boys and girls 13 to 17. In addition to MP3 players and DVD players, digital cameras were popular, with 23 percent of girls saying they owned one, compared with 17 percent a year earlier.
It is grown-ups who are largely footing the bill, the survey indicates. Although more teenagers said they owned high-tech products, Mr. Silver said, few said they had recently bought one themselves, or had any plans to buy one in coming months. When the survey asked the teenagers what they had bought most recently with their own money, only 6 percent listed an electronic device, while 36 percent mentioned clothing; the numbers were similar, he said, for items they said they planned to buy.
\"Kids are very good, and relentless, at getting what they want, from the day they're born,\" said Susan Beacham, a parent of two girls, 13 and 11, in Lake Bluff, Ill., and a founder of Money Savvy Generation, a group that coaches parents and children in fiscal responsibility.
\"The pester power comes with them saying: 'Mom, Madeline has one, so does Mira. Everytime I want to call you, I have to borrow theirs,' \" Ms. Beacham said. \"It comes in the form of questioning your parenting. 'Why wouldn't you keep us safe?' Then it goes to the iPod. 'I've earned it, I excel in school, in excel in sports, why wouldn't you give it to me?' \"
Last Christmas her 13-year-old pleaded that an iPod Mini was \"a piece of the uniform,\" and Ms. Beacham told her she could have one as her one gift, instead of several smaller ones. But when her 11-year-old also wanted one, she was told she had to wait another year. \"For the parent, you're faced with the pressure but you do not have to do it,\" she said. \"Your child will truly survive.\"
Melea Smith, of Naperville, Ill., explained why she caved in to demands by her daughter, 18, and her two older sons to supply them with the obligatory cellphones. \"My kids' friends were pestering me, saying: 'What are you doing? They have to have cellphones,' \" she said. \"It's not that it's the cool thing. It's the must-have thing.\"
Ms. Smith's daughter, Sarah Ross, also acquired an iPod recently. (\"In one of my classes someone had one,\" said Sarah, a senior in high school. She recalled looking it over \"for a half an hour\" one day.) Next she needed a new laptop to go along with her iPod. \"She was bugging me and bugging me,\" Ms. Smith said.
\"It's always the argument that she would be a better student, she could take it anywhere, she could take it to the library,\" Ms. Smith explained with a chuckle. \"You see how it goes.\"
She added, \"That's where my tax refund went.\"
THIS new arena of negotiations between parents and their teenage children means that new boundaries must be explored and eventually set. After Amanda Williams, 18, another high school student in Naperville, got her first cellphone from her parents, she was unclear on how many minutes her plan provided, and that text messages cost money to send. She promptly ran up a $600 bill. Her parents, she said, asked that she pay off the bill with her earnings from a job at a carwash.
\"I had to work really hard,\" she recalled. \"It took up all my tip money.\"
Many parents said that they are happy to provide the big purchases for special occasions like birthdays or Christmas, but that the kids themselves are responsible for extras, like custom ring tones.
Barry Friefield of Scottsdale, Ariz., bought his daughter Lindsay an iPod for her birthday, but \"if she wants to download music out of iTunes, she has to pay for it out of own allowance,\" he said.
Ms. Stangeland, who gave in to her 14-year-old daughter's request for the right MP3 player, said, \"Getting them to appreciate what things cost is a challenge.\" And while Ms. Stangeland also caved in to her two daughters' requests for cellphones in the interest of safety, she held firm when one wanted to upgrade to a camera phone. She told her she would have to scrape together the extra $50 herself.
Throwing in the occasional no \"really does make them stop and think,\" Ms. Stangeland said.
Of course the word no often has the shelf life of the average cellphone itself.
No sooner had Mr. Silvers's teenage daughter worn him down for a cellphone, he said, than his 12-year-old twin sons started \"heavily panting\" for them. He told them to wait, for now. Next year they will be teenagers. Mr. Silvers can already see the writing on the wall.
\"That's a battle,\" he said with a sigh, \"that will be lost soon.\" |
|
发表于 2005-5-28 20:40:57
