Add emotion to your work

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Emotions are invisible feelings that can squeeze tears out of our eyes, set off explosions of laughter or color our face deep red. However, describing emotions like sadness, joy and anger in writing requires both physical description and a lot of imagination.

Read the following excerpts from stories submitted by Green Ink readers. In each one, the author is trying to describe an emotion. As you read, try to figure out which words play an important role in communicating the writer's emotion:

Awe

Like a missionary, our English teacher spoke of God's love for common people like us. His beautiful sentences described Bible stories about Jesus' birth and death and about his curing many sick and raising the dead. These stories made us feel like there was splendid lightning over his head.

Embarrassment and shame

All my classmates were guffawing (哄笑). Suddenly, I realized that I must have made a mistake. I dropped my head and hoped the class would soon end. \"lease sit down and pay more attention to the textbook. Don't bother me again,\" said the teacher. I wanted to hide my head inside my desk, as I could feel my classmates continuing laughter.

Desire

Hanging the black bag on a nail, Mr Wang said, \"Boys and girls, I have brought some food with me. First, let's review our textbook. The one who remembers what we have learned will be rewarded with some food.\" We all raised our hands for a chance to receive the reward.

Editor's comment

These examples all succeed in conveying the writer's emotions, but they do so in different ways.

In the first example, the writer communicates his awe of the \"missionary\" teacher by imagining that \"splendid lightning\" was flashing above his head. Was the classroom really being hit by a bolt of lightning? Of course not, but imagining such a scene indirectly communicates the writer's feelings at the time.

In the second example, the writer wishes she could \"hide [her] head inside [her] desk\". Notice that she doesn't actually hide her head in her desk; instead, she \"wishes\" she could. Using words like wishing and wanting is another way to add imagination and – at the same time – communicate emotion.

In the third example, the students raise their hands to show their desire for a treat. This simple, direct description of physical action also communicates emotion. Nothing else is needed, although we can perhaps imagine some of the students licking their lips as well.

Helpful hints for describing emotions

1. Think about your favorite cartoons. When a cartoon character gets angry, sometimes steam will come out of his or her ears and nose. When a character is happy, the animators sometimes make the character appear to float. Use imaginative images like these to communicate real-life emotions.

2. Observe the people around you. The next time you witness an argument, watch the body motions of the people involved. Study their eyes and ears. What happens to them? Or the next time you're waiting to start an important test, ease your own nerves by trying to observe the students around you. What do they do when they're waiting to begin an important examination?

3. Show – don't tell. Regular Green Ink readers have heard this rule a lot. Don't just say that a young woman who has been dumped feels sad. Show the reader what sadness looks like. Use your imagination. And use your growing vocabulary to describe what you see – for instance, the wet tissue paper in her hand.

Pick up your pen: Write a story about a speech contestant who has just been named the winner. Describe what happens when he or she is called up to the stage to receive the prize. What does he or she say? What does he or she do?