American Men Don't Cry

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American Men Don't Cry

    American men don't cry because it is considered not characteristic of men to do so. Only women cry. Cry is a \"weakness\" characteristic of the femele, and no American male wants to be identified with anything in the least weak or feminine. Crying, in our culture, is identified with childishness, with weakness and dependence. No one likes a cryboby, and we disapprove of crying even in children, discouraging it in them as early as possible. In a land so devoted to the pursuit of happiness as ours, crying really is rather un-American. Adults must learn not to cry in situations in which it is permissible for child to cry. Women being the \"weaker\" and \"dependent\" sex, it is only natural that they should cry in certain emotional situations. In women, crying is excusable. But in men, crying is a mark of weakness. So goes the American belief with regard to crying.
   \"A little man,\" we impress on our male children, \"never cries. Only girls and crybobies do.\" And so we condition males in America not to cry whenever they feel like doing so. It is not that American males are unable to cry because of some biological time clock within them which causes them to run down in that capacity as they grow older, but that they are trained not to cry. And so the \"little man\" controls his desire to cry and goes on doing so until he is unable to cry even when he wants to. Thus do we produce a trained incapacity in the American male to cry. And this is bad. Why is it bad? Because crying is a natural function of the human organism which is designed to restore the emotionally disequilibrated person to a state of equilibrium. The return of the disequilibrated organ systems of the body to steady states or-dynamic stability is known as homeostasis. Crying serves a homeostatic function for the organism as a whole. Any interference with homeostasis is likely to be damaging to the organism. And there is good reason to believe that the American male's trained incapacity to cry is seriously damaging to him.
   It is unnecessary to cry whenever one wants to cry, but one should be able to cry when one ought to cry - when one needs to cry. For to cry under certain emotionally disequilibrating conditions is necessary for the maintenance of health.
   To be human is to weep. The human species is the only one in the whole of animated nature that sheds tears. The trained inability of any human being to weep is lessening of his capacity to be human - a defect which usually goes deeper than the mere inability to cry. And this, among other things, is what American parents - with the best intentions in the world - have achieved for the American male. It is very sad. If we feel like it, let us all have a good cry - and clear our minds of those cobwebs of confusion which have for so long prevented us from understanding the natural necessity of crying.


美国男子汉一般不会哭


   美国的男子汉一般都不会哭。因为男子汉要哭了，那就被认为这个人不具备男子汉的特征。只有妇女才哭。哭是女性软弱的表现。不论做什么事，没有任何一个美国男人想要让人家认为有丝毫懦弱或者像个老娘们似的。在我们的思想文化观念当中，哭哭涕涕总是跟孩子气、懦弱、不能自立联系在一起的。没有任何人会喜欢一个哭闹的孩子，所以即使对儿童们来说，我们也不赞成他们哭，尽可能从很小的时候起，越早越好，鼓励孩子们不要哭。在像我们这样一个热衷于追求幸福快乐的国家里，哭哭涕涕实在不太合乎美国人的风度了。成年人都必须知道，凡在允许小孩子哭的情况下，成年人都不应该哭。因为女性是一种\"软弱的\"、\"依赖男人的\"性别，女性在特定的环境下引起感情波动，若是哭一通也是很自然的。对妇女们来说，哭是可以原谅的。可是对男人来说，哭就会给人留下软弱无能的印象。于是美国人对于哭泣的看法就这样产生了。
   我们让我们的男性儿童铭记在心：\"一个小男子汉永也不会哭的，只有女孩子和刚刚生下来的小娃娃才会哭。\"所以每当美国的男性想要哭的时候，我们就训练他们憋住别哭。这并不是因为他们随着年龄的增长，体内某个生物钟上的哭的能力已经消耗殆尽，而是因为他们被训练的不许哭。于是这\"小男子汉\"想哭的时候，也老是憋着不哭，憋着憋着一直憋到甚至当他想哭的时候也不会哭了。这样，我们就致使美国男性被训练成不会哭的人了。这很不好。为什么不好呢？因为哭是人的有机体中的一种很自然的功能，有一这一功能就是为了让那些感情上失去了平衡人，能恢复到感情上平衡的状态。把人体失去了平衡的器官体系恢复到稳定状态或恢复到正常运作状态下的稳定状态，被称为原状稳定或体内平衡。对体内平衡的任何干扰都有可能损害人体的有机体。所以，我们有充分的理由相信，把美国男性训练得不会哭，这会对美国男性造成严重的损害。
   一个人不论任何时候想哭就哭--这实在是没有必要；但是当一个人应该哭的时候--也就是一个人需要哭的时候，应该能够哭出来。因为哭上一通在某咱内心感情失衡的情况下，对保持身体健康是必要的。
   只要是人就会落泪，把整个动物世界里，人类这个物种是唯一的会流泪的物种。把一个人训练成不会落泪的人，这就在降低了他作为一个人所应有的能力。不具备作为一个人所应有的能力，这一缺陷比仅仅是不会哭泣在意义上要深远得多。而这一点，尤其是这一点，正是那些心怀着人间最美好的用心的美国父母们一心给美国男性养成的。简直是太可悲了。如果我们想哭的话，那就让我们好好地哭上一通吧，把那些很长时候以来使我们不能理解哭这种天性的需要、像蜘蛛网一样束缚人思想的种种糊涂想法，从我们的脑海中清除的干干净净吧。